The one that got away…

We’ve all loved, we’ve all lost. It’s a very rare thing these days to find the love of your life right away. Most of us have “one that got away”. The question is, is it possible to delete that person from your mind and find that kind of love again? Or, will you spend the remainder of your life wondering where that person is, how things could have been, comparing new relationships to that one…..

I got engaged at 19 and I was way too young. We were both very immature and inexperienced. It was the first serious relationship for both of us. We met in college. He was going into the Air Force and I was having a very hard time forcing myself to want to leave my family behind, not pursue my career and travel the globe to be a military wife. We ended it shortly before our wedding date and went our separate ways.

Shortly after I met the love of my life. My army ranger. Its kind of funny how we met. His best friend and roommate came into a store I was working at and asked me out on a date. We didn’t really hit it off, but through him I was able to meet my angel. He was awesome. Sweet, tough, country….and my family loved him. Dad made him cry with his spicy deer jerky and he taught Kyle how to drop the f-bomb while playing a deer hunting game, but….he was still a winner in their eyes. I never thought talking about guns, rucksacks, MREs and woobies could be so entertaining 🙂 He is the one who gave me the BEST Christmas present ever. There is nothing better than waking up to the one you love on Christmas morning. Unfortunately his parents lived 14 hours away in Oklahoma and he had to spend Christmas with them. I of course stayed here with my family. Christmas morning I woke up sad and alone and the day went slowly along. Our family dinner was at 5pm and I tried to stay busy around the house to pass the time. He called me a couple of hours before the dinner and it really brightened my day. As I had him on the phone I heard a knock at my door. When I opened it, I got the biggest suprise…he was there! He had spent Christmas Eve with his family and got up super early to drive 14 hours back to spend Christmas with me. Sweetest moment ever.

Unfortunately it was a time in my life when I was a total idiot, was rebellious and didn’t know which direction I wanted to go in…and because of that, I lost him. I moved to South Florida chasing some bad boy and he went back home to Oklahoma and married his high school sweetheart…

A few years ago when I was living downtown I got a random Myspace invite from him and it felt like a firework went off in my heart. I was incredibly excited and all I could think about was a second chance to make everything perfect. I was going to put his butt on a plane asap and make room in my closet and ta-da!!!! Happily Ever After! But, as luck would have it he was hundreds of miles away, going through a divorce, children were involved and things were really messy. Perfection was well beyond reach. So, I had to let go….

Even though it was years ago I still find myself thinking about him. When I think of the military, when I go anywhere near Dahlonega, Christmas Day, when I meet someone newThe movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind really makes me think. Would it be better to permanently delete certain memories so you can completely move on?


My boyfriends back???

ImageAfter spending numerous hours watching friends fall to pieces over an ex, here lies the question of the day….Is it ever a good idea to rekindle things with an ex?

An ex becomes an ex for a reason. Before you think about lighting the fire of doom again think about the reasons you didn’t like that person. Their attitude, poor work ethic, cheating, language, habits, etc. Are you really able to put the past completely behind you and start fresh or will the past hang around in the back of your mind and nag at you daily? If your significant other cheated, will you ever be able to trust them when they are out alone? If there were physical problems will you ever be able to regain your self-confidence? Do not try to bury the problem because I assure you it will come out full force if an arguement starts. And goodness if there are children involved, do NOT drag them through the agony too.

One of your previous significant others whom you’ve had a relation-shit, and coincidentally, a break up with. In most cases, not someone you ever want to see again. In very VERY rare cases, someone you might still talk to and consider a friend, because you both have a history and too many experiences to forget about together and are both mature enough to push any emotions you have left (if any), aside.

Love is about finding true happiness that lasts. No where in a love story do you hear about either character having to settle. There is no need to settle. There are millions of fish in the sea and unless you’re a hermit, chances are you will run into someone new! Ladies, go buy a new sexy matching bra/panty set, put on a shade of lipstick you’ve never tried, sport some 5″ heels and smile. Guys, might be time to invest in that new cologne everyones been talking about, spend 2 minutes getting your hair just right and do a few extra reps in the gym. Get to feeling good about yourself and that attitude goes a long way and will get you the extra attention you’re after! No more crying over spilled milk!

“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep… wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you…. The one who turns to his friends and says, ‘that’s her.’”